Saturday, May 24, 2008

everything I am for Your kingdoms cause

It shouldn't matter but it does. It shouldn't hurt but it does. I should expect it but I don't. God, I can hear you. It's faint...but I hear your voice. I thank you for being who you are in me. So powerful and quick to love. Teaching me how to love like you have loved me. Forgive like you forgave me. You can't win a war with hate, judging, and more war. First you have to show love. The kind of love of a savior. The kind of love where they don't know what to do except give up fighting and just love back. U t o p i a n .

I'll admit it. I was angry...hurt...upset...more than I have been in a long, long time. But where do those feelings get me? They get me nowhere. If I don't lose that feeling in my heart of anger or bitterness - it will only tear ME down. I am trying to become the best version of me. Jesus is showing me that no matter how hurt you are and how betrayed you feel, you have to forgive. GENUINELY FORGIVE. Show them the love that He shows you every day. I did the same thing to Him that she did to me. And He still loves me. And it's a deeper love that anyone will ever understand. I have to be like that. Be like Jesus.

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down His life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. 1 John 3:16

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