I need this.

It's so obvious...I don't feel like my life is "a mess", but I have made a few yucky decisions lately and I can feel it. I can tell I have hindered my spiritual intimacy with Jesus. And although I know all Jesus wants is for me to come to him, not hide from him, I find myself just turning on the TV or listening to music instead of finding him, or more importantly letting Him find me. This is one disgusting cycle the enemy has me in. I thought it was over. I thought I had conquered it once and for all, but what I forgot is that he is always crouching at my door. And recently I've just been thinking his ideas weren't so bad. And thinking back I want to punch myself in the face. I have an issue with just saying no. And this goes for a lot of different things. I can't say no to good or bad things.

Lord, I am so sorry for screwing up yet again. I know I have a sinful nature, just like everyone else, but I don't want to fall victim of Satan again. You know every strength and every weakness inside my body - so I ask that you would please supply your holiness in every aspect, but especially to those that I am struggling with currently. I thank you for being who you are in me. I praise you for bringing me to a point in my life where I am able to see how relevant your will is in my life. I can't wait to see you face to face, Lord, and wrap my arms around you! Thank you for letting me screw up, so I can be shaped and crafted into who you want me to become. I love you!


Today, two of my oldest and best friends are starting a bible study. My job isn't letting me get what I need out of the tribe, so i am starting this small bible study so i can grow spiritually. But don't worry, because every chance I get I'll be at the tribe!

I feel like I'm going in the right direction

About 4 months ago I was so confused about what I wanted to do and wasn't happy with anything really in my life. Not that I was going through really rough times, but having just moved out on my own, it wasn't going so well. But now I can say that I'm SO HAPPY! Don't get me wrong, I miss my family like CRAZY! It sucks not having them in the same state as you...but I am surrounded by wonderful people. And I'm finally thinking clearly, thanks to grace point. I'm living with Cristi & Andy in their new house and it makes me feel good to be here. I love them to death! Janet, Megan, Tony, Angie & Linda are SO FUN to work with! I loooove them! Especially when Megan wants to play alien face or poke wars. Tony's birthday is coming up and we are doing something AAAAAAAAWESOME for him! I pray it all works out!

I'm sad I had to miss If... tonight, and it looks like for a while now, I'll have to be closing wednesday nights, but I want a mid-week bible study SOO bad! Sarah, Tara & I are going to start up a small discussion. Sarah bought the book tonight at the store, and we are going to find a day that works for all of us and get togetherr. I'm excited!

OOO also, so sunday I officially became a member of Grace Point and I'm going to help out on the baptism team. I'm excited. I wish I could sing in the choir every last sunday of the month, but I have classes until 7:45 on thursdays. Sad day...

ok so some blogs will just be like this. not necessarily deep thoughts, just simply whats been going on.


i recommend you listen to caleb collins. he is amazing.