Well here I am again, writing on this blog! It's been over a year and a half since that has last happened, so let me tell you what brought me back.
My friend Nicole, a friend from high school, messaged me and asked if I had a blog because she wanted to start blogging. At that moment the only technical blog I had was a tumblr account. I didn't really use it for blogging...more as a combination of twitter/facebook, constantly reblogging pictures of vampire diaries, zac efron, jonas brothers, awesome photography...etc. So that all happened last night - I told her my link & that was that. Well this morning I wake up and in my email I have a notification from blogger that someone commented on my blog "I'm Broken - Wide Open" about a Marilyn Monroe quote. Wierd timing....but it made me miss this blog a little bit, so I came back over & spent a little bit of time reading through my old posts and I always love doing that! To relive my spiritual journey. To remember a time when I was constantly questioning, battling, thinking, and processing Jesus. It's a whole lot better than what I do now.
I always find it weird to think about why I am in such a crappy place, spiritually. I don't do drugs. I don't drink in excess. (One or two beers a month is about what I do...if that) I don't have sex. I don't do anything major that would make me hang my head in shame & avoid talking to God. The only thing I feel that is got a hold on me is my lack of drive. I should pray...but I don't. I should read scripture...get to know my God more...but I don't. I should wake up every sunday excited for church...but I don't, until this morning. And I finally made it to the college age bible study on thursday night, and from there - a few snowball events have happened & now I very possibly might have a group of girls that I could open up to & experience community with.
The reason I'm here, and have been so stagnant, is because I don't have any christian friends who were willing to experience life with me. I mean i have those friends but they are really far away in Texas. That does me little good in St Louis. That is why i miss it soooo freaking much sometimes!
But thursday night was sort of an "abouuuut FACE" for my spiritual life. I hope its the turn I needed to make. I woke up this sunday morning and am excited to get into that building and worship God.
But now I need to go jump in the shower or I'll be late!
