to give an honest full update on my spiritual life the past month or so would take me probably a few hours. more energy than i have now. but i came across some of my own words yesterday i had written 3 months ago, and it didn't mean a whole lot then, but yesterday, it brought me to tears.
At the Lakeaway retreat the first week of august, Andy asked us to write down where we wanted ourselves to be in 5 days, spiritually. I wrote down that I wanted to stop fighting to win God's love and just rest in it. When I read over those few words, my mouth dropped. That's basically what I have been struggling with the past few months, and the realization that relief is just as easy as simply finding REST in Him...it gave me goose bumps.
With everything that has been going on in my life the past month or so, I have got so caught up in fighting to win God over or prove that I am worthy of love. Why do I need to do that? I'm not worthy, but he loves me anyway! Thank GOD!!
